A Cappella Crossword

Playlists

I've added my two YouTube playlists over on the center-right panel under the "about" page. Check them out because they're freakin' brilliant.

Here's the latest:

Oh, Bugger All...

It seems that the gaming industry is once again following the tried and true maxim of Hollywood and the United States government: "If at first you don't succeed, throw in more money."

Apparently Sierra is following up on the steaming pile of skunk excrement known as 50 Cent: Bulletproof with a next-gen sequel, 50 Cent: Blood on the Sand.

At this point I hardly expect that Mr. Cent will have to die trying in his quest to get rich, and neither will Sierra. White suburban teenagers in FUBU jackets will fly to this game like Eliot Spitzer to a brothel, only to sell it back to Blockbuster or Game Crazy like the dried-up whore that it is. The only people who won't get rich in this whole deal are said white teenagers, who will get a quick cheap thrill before realizing that they're wallets were stolen when they were asleep. Then they'll go to Gamespot or IGN to
vent their impotent frustrations.

Okay, I'll quit beating that metaphor. Prediction: This game will suck, but it will rake in tons of cash while quality titles are ignored. I'm against almost all regulations, but I wish that the industry would at least put some sort of moratorium on celebrities in games.

My Attempt at Being Glenn Reynolds

Heh. Indeed.

Those that know me are aware that my house was burglarized on March 12th while I was returning from SXSW. For the uninitiated, my house was broken into around 2:30-3:00pm and they made off with my xbox 360, an old powerbook (which they grabbed the wrong charger for) and ripped my TV right off the wall. Needless to say it was shitty news to come home to, but things can be replaced and I was happy that my dog, who was downstairs at the time, wasn't hurt.

Knowing full well that the detectives couldn't be counted on to "search" for the stolen items I took it upon myself to call around to the local pawn shops and the very first one I called (Thanks Google Maps!) recalled a young white man who came in trying to sell a G4 Powerbook but the battery was dead and he didn't have the right charger (clue 1) so he decided not to buy it. He also noted that the screen wouldn't stay up on its own (clue 2), which is the reason it was replaced with a MBP. I immediately knew it was the laptop that was taken from my house and started asking about cameras in the store and if they would be willing to let me somehow get a picture of this guy. The guy working there wasn't sure how to get the images off the security system machine so I took down a digital camera and got some second hand shots off the monitor as well as some video.

Read the whole thing.

GTA IV - Why I (Sort of) Don't Care

I'm sure that on April 29th people will be murdering each other to get a copy of Grand Theft Auto IV, and with good reason: GTA is one of the few gaming franchises that has never disappointed. Every version has always been an improvement over the last, if we don't count the portable spin-offs, and it's always fun to play the bad guy. After all, who hasn't played even so innocuous a title as The Sims without doing something evil? It's fun.

I won't be waiting in line, though. First of all, the damn game is going to sell out at every retail store on the planet within two minutes, and they won't restock it for at least a month. This was my experience with both Vice City and San Andreas. It's like trying to see a long-awaited movie on opening night. Why bother fighting the crowds when you can just wait a few weeks and get the exact same product? I'm sure I'll buy it at some point, because it probably will be awesome, but I see no reason to be trampled in the process.

This is just one example of how stupid the hype around this game is. It's every bit as stupid as the Halo edition of the 360. Seriously, are these things going to become collectors' items one day? They're electronic gizmos. It doesn't matter if it has a fancy decal for an extra hundred dollars, because we all know that the thing will be obsolete in a few years anyway. My 360 is the old white model, and it works just fine without any customization. My only complaint is that I bought it before it came with an HDMI output, but that's just another example of how good Microsoft is at screwing things up and pissing off customers. (How did this Gates guy become the richest man in the universe again?)

Count me out. I have enough games to last well into summer, when all this will die down. That being said, here is some footage from the first GTA and the latest to show just how far we have come in only a few years. I can't say I'm not just a little excited.

Then:

And now:

The New Betamax

I am quite glad that I never forked out the two hundred dollars for the Xbox 360 HD DVD player, because now, as everyone knows, the format has gone down the toilet. That being said, when I saw that the price had dropped to fifty bucks and realized that HD DVD was about to go through a fire sale, I figured that buying cheap wasn't such a bad investment, so I ordered the player through Circuit City and it arrived a few days ago.

My impressions: I really can't tell the difference between HD and regular DVD, except to say that the former definitely has better sound quality. Any DVD mastered in HD will probably look just as good as an HD DVD, unless you own some sort of ninety-inch TV that is worth more than both of my kidneys. But, I picked the thing up and the movies are on sale, so here is my tiny HD DVD library so far:

300
Blade Runner (5 disc set)
Dawn of the Dead (2004 remake)
Enter the Dragon
King Kong (it came with the player)
Land of the Dead
Shaun of the Dead

I am also proud to announce that I now own the entire George Romero Dead series, as well as the Evil Dead trilogy. Finals are for losers.

Your Demo Sucks - Conflict: Denied Ops

This demo was actually the inspiration for this series of videos I plan to make. It was just that dumb. Basic overview: The graphics suck, the dialog is sub-moronic, the friendly AI is dumber than a bag of rocks being beaten with a box of hammers, and the enemy AI is worse.

This is the first official review of the series, and it's over a week late, since the game launched at the end of February. (Here is one of many nasty reviews of the game as a whole.) Also, it's a bit rough around the edges because it's the first time I mixed video with my own audio, but I hope it's still enjoyable. Things will improve with practice. And now....Conflict: Denied Ops.

Your Demo Sucks - Conflict: Denied Ops from Gene on Vimeo.

YouTube Is a Cesspool Part Deux

Just to irritate my YouTube troll, I decided to upload another video of a Road Rage event in Burnout with a French soundtrack, this time using La Chanson de Jacky by Jacques Brel. It's not perfect. The music doesn't sound very good because I was using a video editor with which I'm still a bit unfamiliar, but I made the video in about a half hour, so everything pretty much worked out.

The next morning, I had already received a one-star rating. I really can't tell if it's the same fellow, but I'm guessing it is. I do have one fan in Romania who gave the original video five stars and subscribed to the channel, though, and when I had to delete the first video (thereby losing his rating and comment) I asked him to do me a favor and re-rate it. Well, he did me one better by leaving this comment:

Sure M8. And if he does not understand what you try to accomplish with the music, he is an uncultured swine.

The English is slightly broken, but I think we would all have to admit that it's better than that of the American who left the earlier comment. Also, I love the phrase "uncultured swine." We Americans don't use phrases like that nearly enough. Anyway, here is the latest Burnout video, warts and all.

La Chanson du Burnout Paradise from Gene on Vimeo.

Dulce et Decorum Est Pro Patria Mori

I love Call of Duty 4. In the ongoing battle between Call of Duty 4 and Halo 3, I would definitely pick Call of Duty. I own both and they're both great, but I simply prefer firing machine guns to firing laser beams. However, playing online has been a bit irksome lately, what with all the trash talking and screeching children infecting Xbox Live, so I haven't been playing online very much lately. My current rank is around 27 in COD 4 (whatever that equates to,) and I've been more than happy to let it fester while the online addicts get better and I forget how to aim my gun. Besides, Burnouthas taken up a lot of my gaming time lately.

Anyway, I needed to buy a cable the other day, so I went down to the local mega electronics store, and after finding said cable I decided to check out the Xbox 360 games on sale. Nothing since Burnout has interested me lately, but Call of Duty 2 was on sale, so I figured I'd pick it up. It's Infinity Ward, after all, and I remember playing the game at Blockbuster a few years ago when the 360 first came out and being pretty impressed with the presentation, so it seemed like a good purchase. Besides, it rounded out the collection.

I played through the first two levels (which were great, in typical fashion,) and then decided to try my hand at the multiplayer. The video I have attached is my first two rounds of a Deathmatch, wherein my death played a pretty prominent role. I have to give credit to the guys with whom I played. In spite of the slaughter, I was never called a "n00b" in spite of the fact that that's exactly what I was. I hope that anyone reading this site can find some joy in my humiliation.

Call of Duty 2 - Lamb to the Slaughter from Gene on Vimeo.

Blu-ray...You Saw Me Standing Alone...

I love rumors, if only for the sheer misery of knowing that my originally overpriced toy will soon become even more obsolete. I can console myself (no pun intended) with the fact that I never bought the HD DVD player for the 360, but that doesn't make up for the fact that Microsoft decided to add an HDMI output to the system mere months after I put the thing on my credit card.

Now comes a rumor that they're going to release a Blu-ray player for the machine, which will officially make a good setup more expensive than a PS3. Well, folks, we still have the better games. At least for now.

Oh misery of miseries, to live with component cables and a standard DVD player...

Inaugural Post - Burnout Paradise

Welcome to A Cappella Crossword. The inaugural post is a combination of behind the scenes tomfoolery and frustration that eventually led me to TypePad.

Anyway, to set up the following carnage: if you are not familiar with Burnout Paradise, it is the latest in a series of racing games designed specifically to show just how psychotic you can be on a virtual road. This particular scene is one that I recorded in Showtime mode, where the job is to destroy as many innocent cars as possible. This is not my highest score in the game so far, but it gives a fairly accurate representation of the game's general psychosis.

The game features an incredibly annoying soundtrack and an equally annoying deejay, so I muted both and gave the video my own soundtrack. Also, I am not unaware of the irony that my first post on this weblog is almost nine minutes of a fiery, horrific catastrophe. Enjoy, and come back for more.

Burnout Paradise, Cabaret Edition from Gene on Vimeo.